Dear Loco,

Dear Loco, Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts,…

Dear Loco, Since nothing of note happened today, apart from me wrestling with my to-do list, let me tell you about something that happened on the 1st. I decided to play Brene Brown’s Call to Courage on Netflix for mum, and there’s a part where she talks about losing people you love and still having…

Dear Loco, I intended to do a lot of work today, but I went with Chutney to submit the forms for my license and ended up just following the road to Avati. I went to “our” spot at Avati. I remember trying to get you back in the carrier, and you resisted with full force.…

Dear Loco, I tried to work, and succeeded some. Mostly I got some quality time in with Nins. I went to hang with Nins and Azur. He gave me books. She gave me cuddles, and I got lots of behind the ear sniffs. She smells and reminds me of you. There’s a love and a…

Dear Loco, I snapped at mum, and she coaxed me to lunch. So much hurt keeps randomly rising to the surface, and I wonder where does it go when I’m not thinking about it because it always seems to surprise me with it’s existence. Sometimes I think it’s as simple as saying “Goodbye”, and then…

Dear Loco, It was a quiet day of work, and processing life. What’s a new year without you anyway? The whole ritual of a new year coming, and a new year passing brings with it both dread and comfort – a blank canvas and a clean slate.The dread that comes from not knowing where to…

Dear Loco, I woke up with the same exhaustion from yesterday, and then had to remind myself NONE OF THIS MATTERS. This to-do list that feels never-ending is just a thing I made up in my head. I stopped, I stared at Luna and took a moment – after which things started to slow down,…

Dear Loco, I took the morning to myself – showered and fumed over breakfast. A family of 7 were being very loud at the breakfast buffet, and I sat there fuming instead of saying something because it just takes so much effort. Even here balance would be nice – getting to “Everyone is great. They’re…

Dear Loco, I decided to stay another day at the hotel. I like this little bit of space and change SO MUCH. I got a little bit more done today, than yesterday. I watched less TV, I made schedules and plans. I paced, and imagined that you were doing that thing where you walk beside…

Dear Loco, I did a bit of self-care today, and then set myself up at a hotel. I needed some space to think and work on the content for Caro’s website. Gosh, it always feels so nice to tend to myself! At the same time, I’ve been feeling SO guilty – like I’ve abandoned you.…