I’ve been keeping meticulous all-around journals. Note that I said meticulous. I don’t know what to do with them, but I am paying attention in the way I know how and can!
Luna and I have come to a wonderful understanding off late. We really communicate which is funny it should come at a time in my life I am attempting to do that anyway. We talk, I get that she’s complicated. She’s so much my child, it’s not funny.
She’ll say be jealous and be worried about her kid all at the same time. She’ll say something and be indecisive and half mean it. She’s also grown so much and feels so mature. You should see her patiently handling Lucha. She also still feels like my baby, i.e. needs to be the baby.
So many shapes are taking that I didn’t think I was ready for but I’ve always wanted, and in some ways I am so grateful. I am trying to be open. It comes as a double-edged sword too sometimes – like Alina leaving, or the stress around the house. For now, I can see it all worked out in my favour.
I miss you, kanna.
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