Dear Loco,

We left early to Masinagudi. I’ve been clocking all my experiences as “What would Loco do”, and thought to myself “Of course he’d love to go to the jungle”. But I felt so blegh, and kept trying to redirect my brain to think “happy thoughts”. Though I’m not sure you cared just for happy thoughts – You took time for yourself when you needed to, right?

I guess I’ve been telling myself – I’m in your debt now, and I have to live my life in service of the gift that your companionship gave me. And I want to. I, also, felt like I needed some quiet reflection.

So, quietly, on the ride there I listened to every love song I’ve ever yearned to put a face to. And I thought about you.
Some people want it all
But I don’t want nothin’ at all
If it ain’t you, baby
If I ain’t got you, baby
Some people want diamond rings
Some just want everything
But everything means nothing
If I ain’t got you, yeah

Love you, Babloo. (I’m forgetting all the names I’ve had for you. They came so naturally – the kind conjured by the gorgeous sight of you. Memory is a fickle mistress.)

One response to “WWLD?”

  1. I’m not sure what alchemy it is that has turned your grief into these poignant words Meowma, but each one packs so much strength. I cannot for the life of me imagine how you’ve processed and continue to process your grief everyday, make sense of them and write them out here. Not just for yourself, but to be seen by someone who chances upon your little slice of internet. You’re incredible ❤️

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